This Is My Nightmare!!!!!!

Ive always had a huuuge fear of sharing food (strangely certain people are exempt from this fear) because of my fear of germs, and also because people are disgusting lol and when someone (lets just call him john) moved in my apartment last year i made is sooooo ridiculously clear that we werent a house that shares food, silverware, or drinks from any containers or anything. Now before i continue id like to tell you about *John. *John has reused paper plates...that were already in the garbage can. *John regularly eats old expired food. *John took food out of a dumpster because "its still good it just didnt look fresh enough for them to sell so i took it". *John uses the kitchen (food) scissors to cut his hair...in his room...over the carpet. *John has a general lack of hygiene that i personally dont understand, and yesterday around 4pm i witnessed *John licking the a glob of mayo...off the mayo jar. THIS IS MY FUCKING NIGHTMARE!!!! what else did he lick?!?! what does he do to the food in my fridge?!?! I have enough of an issue when he reaches into a bag of chips, i wont eat those chips anymore but this?? This is crossing the line..Its crossing 100 lines its disgusting and my kitchen is on lockdown now. Your probably wondering why i put up with *John, well because he gives me $100 every week and since i cant work cause of my CF now thats all i have and i dont have a choice but to put up with it. However i am clearing out areas for his food and buying doubles of everything and i am going to so strictly enforce culinary segregation if he so much as looks at any of my stuff for too long ill come down like the hammer of fucking Thor on his ass. Thinking back, he moved in last June, before then i had been in the hospital about once a year, since then i have been in the hospital every 3-5 months and spend most of the rest of the time feeling tired and run down at home...coincidence?? Idk..he works delivering meds and medical supplies and im thinking hes picking stuff up at work and bringing it back to me, and hes probably touching all my food and what not and im getting sick from it, and not only will the kitchen be on lockdown now but the apt in general..I will disinfect this place every single day Im trying soooo hard to get my lung function up because frankly im terrified. Ive been very sick lately and if it doesnt go the other way soon its not gonna end up good, and i love my life way to much to have it end this soon. Im so grossed out right now :( ew. DuJour means hygiene.

Cleaning spree 10.0 begins now.

A Day In The Life of Meeeee!! ( and stupid cf)

I tend to feel alot like this....

Im getting increasingly annoyed with CF, and i dont think people understand just how difficult it is especially right now when im on iv antibiotics and how much time and energy it takes to keep myself feeling as well as i do, which isnt even that good most of the time, so i thought id take you all through a day in the life of Rachel!! :) I have to also watch how much i eat every day to make sure i get all the nutrition i can as im trying to gain weight and have been my whole life. I need at least 600 calories and 33 grams of protein at meals to make my daily goal of 3,000-3,500 calories and 150-200 grams of protein. My snacks need to be around 400 calories and again around 33 grams of protein. Although i dont always make my food goals and admittedly some treatments go missed as im so exhausted i tend to fall asleep a few times throughout the day my doctor, nutritionist, and I made a generic plan of how a typical day should go which is what ive included. So heres my day!!

6 A.M. ~ wake up to do Piperacillin which runs for 30 mins through my picc line

10 A.M. - Wake up again!! Time for more meds

• 1 pulmozyme nebulizer treatment (10 mins)
• advair inhaler
• 1 adek vitamin
• 1 vitamin d
• 1 zithromax
• 1 albuterol nebulizer treatment (15 mins)
• use my VEST machine for 15 mins
• 3 creon enzymes
• eat a breakfast of at least 600 calories and 33 grams of protein

12 P.M. - it usually takes me till now to be dressed and ready for whatever i have to do that day, i move pretty slow so i dont cough so much and it can be fairly difficult to do things with a picc line in my arm, but before i do anything else i have to eat again, and do more meds.

• 2 creon enzymes
• cayston nebulizer treatment (5 mins)
• eat a snack of at least 400 calories/33 g. protein

2 P.M. - my second dose of piperacillin. (30 mins)

3 P.M. - by now im relying healvily on coffee or energy drinks to do anything and i feel like i could drop over and sleep for hours, the lectures about how bad they are for me are annoying..please stop. :)

• IV dose of tobramyacin (1 hour)
• albuterol nebulizer treatment (15 mins)
• 3 creon enzymes
• lunch of 600 cal/33 g protein

5 P.M.

• cayston nebulizer treatment (5 mins)
• 2 creon enzymes
• snack of 400 cal/33 g. protein

8 P.M. - i may move this down to 7 if i have plans :)

• advair inhaler
• 1 vitamin d
• 1 adek vitamin
• 1 albuterol treatment (15 mins)
• 3 creon
• meal of 600 cal/33 g. protein
• 15 mins on VEST machine

10 P.M. - ^same as the last one, it might get moved to 9.

• piperacillin (30 mins)
• cayston nebulizer treatment (5 mins)
• 2 creon
• high protein health shake

11 P.M.-6 A.M. i use 2 liters of oxygen overnight and will hopefully be getting a salt machine as well which ill use all night!! I heard amazing things about them!

So thats about what i have to do every day, some days i add on cipro and prednisone every 8 hours but luckily im off of those antibiotics for right now and in the summer i drink a gatorade with a teaspoon of salt in it every 5 hours as im extremely salt deficient, but this is a lot. It can take up my entire day and eating that much food can make me feel so sick i dont even wanna move, i work really hard at taking care of myself all week because my life literally depends on it. Saturday nights are soooooooo needed to blow off steam after that! haha, so when i sleep in the times i have no meds or i dont have to make a snack or a meal im not lazy, & I dont not have a job or go to school because im lazy or i dont care, i wish i could. this is exhausting and really takes my days away from me. Im quite proud of everything that i am able to do, but i need to buckle down and follow my meds a bit stricter as i can feel myself getting sicker. Maybe one day people will get that and wont judge us CFers so hard for the ""lack of effort we put into things" as ive heard it called many many times.